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In a time when traditional courtship is even more obsolete than the middle-class way of life, many American women are still after Hollywood-style “butterflies,” even though these incomparably selfish women have no clue about the compromise and sacrifice for another person required by any truly loving and lasting romantic relationship.

Non-American women, not being raised in a culture of fantasy and entitlement, tend to require only that you be moderately attractive, fairly decent and kind, with a bit of money in the bank and game to go with it—it’s always necessary, you see, to be keep women turned on and not bored.

In fact, I have lived longer in Paris than any other city I grew up in.

Curious minds want to know what French guys think about all kinds of things, so today, my husband, Tom, is kicking off a new series called The Frenchman speaks: Ask Tom Tuesdays.

When you’re married to a French man, you marry a man intrinsically tied to his culture and country. So be ready for an entire new world to open up before you, and be prepared to sharpen your wits and tongue at the same time.

This year, I celebrate my 25 wedding anniversary with my French husband. My goodness, I’ve lived longer with this man than any member of my own family.

Even if you are an average looking man, so long as you pay your bills, can carry on an interesting conversation, treat the woman well, and not bore her right from the beginning, you will generally be given a fair chance.For those wondering what it’s like to date a Frenchman, here are 15 things to knowincluding the truths, myths, pluses and quirks. Don’t worry about your atrocious accent because they think it’s cute.) They love American girls because they’re fun and enjoy sex, whereas French girls tend to have cyber-coded chastity belts locking up their vaginas. In many cases, sleeping with him on the first night is the kiss of death for a relationship. On the other hand, many French boys have figured out points #1 and #2, and know how to use it to their advantage. But for the nice French boys, it’s helpful to know that he’s likely not dating anyone else besides you. If you’re all about making out in front of grandmas on the subway, then there’s no problem. Despite claiming fame to the “French kiss,” not all French guys are good kissers. True: they love eating (but not all know what outstanding food is, or how to cook) and love a good wine.These guys are your classic douchebags and are relatively easy to spot. The French haven’t really wrapped their minds around the concept of “dating” yet. They’ll probably refer to you as their “girlfriend” after the second date, say “I love you” some two weeks into it, and possibly propose to you before a year is up. There’s one technique I’ve experienced a few times that I call the washing machinewhen a guy sticks his entire tongue in your mouth, doesn’t move his lips, and swirls his tongue around in big, circular motions. But they’re also not afraid to drink a Cosmopolitan in public. Obvious bonus: an accent so hot that they can read the small print on a beer bottle and make it sound sexy. A French man’s personal style is very uniform-y, and he tends to have a closet filled with variations on the same outfit.Non-American women are also enjoyable to be around, good for more than sex: you can relax and enjoy their company without having to worry about calculating your every move, lest you slip up and prompt them “not to settle.” And they will respect you from the beginning, as well as be grateful and gracious to you for treating them well.By contrast, my friend and I recently met two American women for drinks and within the first ten minutes one pulled out her phone and started texting.

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